I am always amazed to hear of scientists debating the existence of intelligent life on other planets, as the existence of intelligent life on this world has not yet been proven to my satisfaction. These same scientists are beaming radio spam-waves to far corners of the galaxy in the hope that some kind alien race will answer, and perhaps clue them in to the secret of perpetual motion.

Total answers so far: 0

I think that the fact that no alien race has answered our radio signals only proves their intelligence, if of course, they exist.

Imagine for a moment that you are a mature, wise, and generally advanced alien civilization. And you start receiving messages from a bunch of genocidal, self-destructive wackos. Let’s call them earth-trash. These messages are loud, but very primitive. Not just because the species in question is very stupid, but also because very few resources can be spared for messages production due to the important work of war, slaughter and environmental destruction.

So there you are, sipping your alien cocktails, watching your green alien sun set behind the tranquil gelatin mountains, when suddenly a new batch of radio transmissions comes in from earth. It’s like getting a crank call from the Institute for the Psychotically Gifted. Do you answer? Do you encourage them? Do you invite them to pop over to your world for lunch? Do you send a really short space-bus to get them?

No flipping way.

You turn on the answering machine, have another drink and you hope that the earth nuts haven’t discovered faster than light travel.

You’d hate to have to move again.

-Ruckford MacMullit

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Find more intelligent humor by Brent Diggs at his blog The Ominous Comma